In the book, “The Four Agreements”, by Don Miguel Ruiz, there are four unspoken agreements that we make over time and he explores how they affect our lives and our relationships. His premise is that we have made many unspoken agreements in our lives and that if we can learn the four agreements that he discusses, we can radically improve the quality of our lives. I have read the book several times and I agree that these agreements can make a huge impact on how we live and how we feel about ourselves and others. Let’s look at each agreement and see if we can begin to implement at least one of them over the next few weeks.
The first agreement is to always use your word impeccably. To use your word impeccably is to use it in a positive way, that is helpful, not harmful, and that is honest and kind.
When we “joke” with someone in a hurtful way and then blame them because we were “just kidding”, is NOT being impeccable with your word. When we are telling someone something we know will make them angry or be hurtful, but we are “just being honest”, this is NOT being impeccable with our word. When we share unverified information with each other (gossip), we are NOT being impeccable with our words.
Last month I asked people to pay more attention to their language because it influences us in all areas of our lives (relationships with self and others included). If you did that, think back or look at your notes and reflect on how often you may have not been using your words impeccably. I know I cannot say that I am ALWAYS impeccable with my words, but I can say that I have learned to pay more attention and I am far better at it than I used to be. It is a challenge because we get used to certain ways of communicating, but it is worth it if we want to make improvements in our life and our relationships.
Think about this and see where you are and we will continue this discussion next time! Have a great day!