I was talking to a friend about taking some time to do only what I want to do. I explained that during the summer, I was going to take some time (how much is still undetermined) and only do what I want to do. I was a little surprised by her response.
“You can’t do that! What would you do?” My response was that I didn’t know, but I wanted to try it and see what would happen. After a few moments, she said, “If we only did what we wanted, life would be too easy.”
Then we both looked at each other and laughed. I asked her if she thought about what she said and what would be wrong with life being easier? She honestly said she really didn’t know what would be wrong with that, but that we are trained that it has to be harder than what I was planning to try.
Bingo! We are trained to insist that things be harder than they have to be. We tend to make things harder than they have to be. I see this in my counseling practice all the time. Many times there can be a simple solution, but people will tell me, “That’s too easy. It cannot be that easy.” Sometimes, people will try what I recommend and come back and be pleasantly surprised that it works and it is easy. Others will come back and tell me that they were right, it didn’t work. (On a side note, often when I have this group explain how they did what I asked and what their experience was, and I learn they have changed what I asked them to do or finally acknowledge that they didn’t really try it.)
Humans do love our struggles! We hang on to them like a badge of courage. And yet, I ponder, why and is it really necessary? I believe life can be easier and much more fun. So, I am going to continue to try things out and ponder the possibilities!
Have a great day!